the Dark Side

I was too embarrassed and a bit ashamed that I had picked on my toe again. So this "negative" image is all you're going to see of the episode. I guess I have to now elaborate on the why or what would cause one to do this? The funny part (or not so funny) is that I really didn't think there was anything wrong with it or that it was that big of a deal!? I probably never would have either if it weren't for "NF" pointing out the obvious to the idiot! Wow! Isn’t it hysterical that the girl with a degree in Psych & So.Behavior, with multiple years of counseling...doesn't see this as a problem!?!

Incredible.

Now, after actually examining the pattern of behavior with an open heart and willingness to see what this might be about...I can see that it is indeed clearly linked to anxiety. If it started in my teen years....which was most certainly an anxious season of anyone's life...and then resurfaced again {at seemingly random times during my life} in my toxic 1st marriage...and now during this crazy chapter of navigating motherhood, stepmotherhood, wifehood, & educating those little hoods. Ya, I guess I’ve been a wee-bit stressed out. So there you have it, I attack my toe when I’m my world seems unmanageable. Think of my toe as the island that harbors some of the bad stuff and I am simply ridding the world of that bad stuff. I don't intend to maim it completely; I just want to get "it" out. Is that so wrong!?!